Sunday and Ease
I find myself already slowing down a bit, which is decidedly wondrous, like, after a rather scary bit of the shakes this morning, I finally got back to sleep after hours, which allowed me to wake up when the sun was high in the sun, and today was a day for basking in the light within the cottage. Just sun streaks and gorgeous throughout the house and outside the backdoor was the most delicious spot for taking the sun full on the face like a very cat or a cat who is wise and has lived many lives.
With my previous pregnancies, sudden arrivals of cold chills that last for minutes and sometimes much longer, was an unhappily frequent occurrence. Last night was the second time it had happened, the first months ago and very brief, so brief that I had forgotten it until I started writing just now. No doctor was ever able to nail it down besides a random fluctuation of hormones. Regardless, it was very unsettling. The last time it happened with my daughter the chills wouldn’t stop and that was what led me to going to the hospital to give birth to her the next day. Considering the last week has had these random appearances of back pain as well, radiating deep behind me, that I would associate with back labor, the chills had me on edge. But nothing beyond a brief interlude that a breathing deeply got me through easily. Like little testers for this creative mami, like, let me remind you that you should be practicing this skill of breathing through pain.
Yesterday I completed most of my tasks (checked off below), though a little later into the night. Still I was in bed by midnight or so, reminding me that, when left to my own devices and my own timetable, I am still a nightowl. The last few months of this pregnancy, with two littles under 6, especially once my son started school with a 7:30am start time, I’ve been going to bed each night at around 8:30/9pm. Also, very unsettling. Hence, why I haven’t been as productive; I do much of my creative work at night and have for probably decades at this point. The adjustment to day time hours when those are historically when I rest has been … nearly impossible.
But here, on residency, the kids well supported and not sick when I left, I’ve been able to check in just once or twice a day, with no need to organize anything more than the weekly schedules. I’ve just been able to be here, fully here, and dream and create … and unfortunately still cough a lot as I’m still getting over the demonic germs that assault my children and that they have passed on to me. Still, things are moving in my art! Tomorrow ends the residency and then I’m off to my daily life, headed straight to picking up the kids at a doctor appointment. Still needing to figure out my rhythm, particularly as this new baby comes.
Tasks for yesterday
Tea and rest
Write 2 poems
1 consultation
Return to the greenhouse with additional poems
Work on the launch of Esperimento sul Respiro
Acentos Review anthology (1 year)
Apply for Dodge Poetry call
Apply for NEA
Send out some of the new poems for funsies
Werewolf romance outlining
Charcoal and oil pastel afternoon/evening
Tasks for Sunday
Tea and rest
Apply for NEA
Write 2 poems (still working on this, but may not happen)
2 consultations (not going to happen today, I don’t think - I’ll return to consults on Tuesday and Wednesday). 1 consultation completed!
return to YA novel and write a chapter for funsies (wrote a bit of a chapter of the werewolf romance)
Acentos Review .5 years
Charcoal and oil pastel afternoon/evening
